Survivor-1

Burning. I could feel burning. And pain in my leg. Where was I? How did I get here? Then it hit me, yes I remembered now I was on a plane flying back from Sydney, to see my folks, but how did this happen? How could it happen? We were flying for a good 5 or 6 hours then that was it, all I could remember. Well that and the fact that the woman in front of me was wearing handcuffs. I blacked out.
The burning, its getting more intense it must be close. Oh Sh*t the planes on fire!

“HELP! PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME!”

But I can’t my legs, they’re trapped, anyway I need help too.

“Hey, I hear you! But I’m trapped too, the back of the plane’s on fire, its spreading pretty fast too. I’ll try and move this trolley, just hold on I’m not gonna’ leave you.”

The pain it was so overwhelming but I had to get out of this mess, the trolley must have rolled into me when we crashed, I wasn’t bleeding but the trolley was heavy and I was sure I had broken something. It took me a few moments to build up the strength needed to topple the trolley, then at last the trolley was no longer a problem; only the pain in my leg from where it once rested.
The smoke was now pouring into the fuselage (the space I was in could no longer be called a plane) it was almost impossible to see the trapped woman through the thick of it all, not to mention the fact it burned both my eyes and chest. “I’m officially in hell.” I thought as I fumbled about with my seatbelt.

Getting to the woman proved a difficult task, I had to first conquer the sea of luggage, then try and remove her without making the wound on her leg any worse. She had a broken leg, seeing her leg made mine feel insignificant, the bone was protruding and blood stained the once blue seat.

“you’re gonna be ok, I promise… what’s your name?”

“Sally, you?”

“Robert”
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More to come deppendent on response.

Disclaimer: dot own lost n all that shizz so dont make a lawsuit out of it lol Very Happy

Sean xx

MOD EDIT: Chapters 2, 3 & 4 added from other topics, which have now been locked:

Day 2

10:00 am

Sally didn’t make it.

(Decided to pass the time until help arrives, writing down some of my thoughts, who knows when we get back some newspaper might pay big money for em, the News of The World will buy anything.)

Luckily for me there’s a doctor on the island, Jack’s patched me up good he doesn’t think I’ve broken anything. In the cold light of day I feel pretty stupid screaming like a girl when people around me were actually dying. I’m amazed at how many of us have survived; total numbers were not really sure of, yet alone where we are! Still, help must get here soon, a plane of that size doesn’t blip off the radar without some geek in a tower noticing.

1:00 pm

Must have fallen asleep, still don’t feel right. Must be jetlag!

There’s talk that Dr Jack, a fellow Brit Charlie and some woman are on a ‘mission’ to find the planes ‘miracle black box’. Why bother? Just enjoy the beach and sun until the cavalry gets here. They must have located where we are by now.
Think I’ll find myself a shady spot and something to eat.

10:00 pm

It’s dark but we’ve managed to set up a camp, my shady spot proved useful I’ve never seen so much rain, I thought it was bad in Birmingham. Mind you not that I’ve got much here to get wet. The wonderers have returned, no black box and from what they said no pilot either! Seemed to be pleased though that they’ve found a fancy walkie-talkie, found that but they can’t find a signal. They’re gonna try higher ground tomorrow.
There’s been strange goings on in the jungle, trees falling and weird noises mind you with the weather we just had im not surprised the mind does tend to play tricks when it’s got nothing else to do.

I’m shattered, time for bed. Rescue tomorrow no doubt.

Day 5

Haven’t felt much like writing, can’t believe were still here. I know there’s something we’re not being told. The ‘wanderers’ are being very cagey about what went on when they found the transceiver. They went on their mission to find higher ground I know they’ve found a signal I’ve heard them talking. What anyone plans to do about it some of us don’t seem to be in on.

The group is finding out their pecking order at the moment Lord of The Flies comes to mind. I aint bothered at the moment im more concerned about how long this food and water’s gonna last, is there enough till help arrives and what happens if there isn’t? Think I’ll go on my own mission tomorrow to find fresh water.

Things have been pretty manic these last couple of days that marshal didn’t have a very nice death, well I take it he’s dead cos the screaming stopped, guess Dr Jack’s only as good as his equipment. Worried about my leg now! Perhaps it’s broken after all.

There’s some weird woman at the far end of the beach, she just sits there looking out at the sea, I feel as though I should see if she’s ok but none of the women have bothered perhaps they know something I don’t. One girl I have noticed is a lovely blonde, Shannon, haven’t sussed out whether that bloke Boone is her boyfriend or not though, she could certainly make the days go faster!

Gotta sign off now, we’re having some sort of memorial service for the dead, at least it’ll stop those b*****d boars messing with the dead bodies.

Day----can’t remember

Been a few days since I last wrote this journal, my mind has been wandering onto many different things and I’d kinda lost the will to be bothered.
I’ve found a new lease of inspiration now though………I’m building my own raft!
The camp seems very tense; I don’t really know where I stand with anyone here so I’ve decided it’s in my best interests to keep a low profile and not antagonize anyone. One bloke Sawyer found himself with a lovely knife wound in his arm after some agro over medicines. The sexy blonde suffered because of it, selfish b*****d deserved what he got, who the hell does he think he is?
Sayid, the stabber, disappeared for a while and came back with some crazy tales about some French chick and another group of people. Trying to scare us incase we decide to do anything about the stabbin if you ask me, nothing like a fright to deflect attention. I mean we’re crashed on some god forsaken island god knows where and I’m supposed to believe that if there were people here they wouldn’t have seen the plane come down and helped us by now??!
Certainly scared the pregnant girl she’s been fussin over some weird nightmares she’s been havin about these people messin with the unborn baby. Some crazy Sh*t happening, time to go it alone hence the raft. Nothing fancy, just big enough for me to get away from this mad ass group. No one else seems to care that help aint comin and if we don’t do something were gonna waste away here. The poxy rabbits they’re hunting aint gonna go very far.
A few ingeniously crafted branches could easily be held together to support one man for long enough to search out near by land and civilization. Hell I’m bored to tears waitin for someone to have the bottle to go for it so looks like it’s me. I’m gonna keep it low key though, don’t want anyone sussing me out and taking my raft for themselves. Cant trust anyone, the Hurley dude must be feelin the same he’s gone to see if he can get something with every ones name on, seeing as the fuselage is now under the sea it should be fun….unless he knows something I don’t, god I’m getting paranoid. I’ll end up playin golf at this rate.

Last edited by Dharma_Dork on Sun Mar 09, 2008 10:22 pm; edited 1 time in total

I'm glad someone else is writing fanfic's, although i lack the energy and motivation to drive me on to doing mine again.

A few tips, writing in third person is much easier than writing in first person. By all means carry on writing in first person but explaining stuff is a lot harder, you will have to use phrases like "I saw this," and "I heard that," a lot. Also, when writing diologue it is helpful to the reader to put "I said......" or "She said......" at the begining or end of the speech so people know who has said it there and then.

Other than that you seem to have done a good job, an that is only friendly advice, you dont have to follow it at all Very Happy

Kep up the Fanfic writing.

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"Take what you can and give nothing back!"
"Trust is the hardest thing to gain, yet the easiest thing to loose,"

Not a bad effort at all. Very Happy

But I agree with what blitz said about writing in third-person. You would be doing yourself a favour if you changed.

But there is absolutely no reason why you shouldn't keep writing. There isn't enough fanfic in the world, and I whole-heartedly encourage you to continue with this! Very Happy

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#5 Member of the 'League of X' elite board.

I myself like to read in first person, just as long as you identify who is doing the talking.

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LIVE SIMPLY. LOVE GENEROUSLY. CARE DEEPLY. SPEAK KINDLY. LEAVE THE REST TO GOD

I suppose at the end of the day, it's up to you, DD. As long as you bear in mind what cheryl said, I'm sure it will be a very enjoyable read. Very Happy

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#5 Member of the 'League of X' elite board.

ok thanks for feedback, guess id better start the next installment

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Secret0Window

I guess you'd better! And I look forward to reading it! Very Happy

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#5 Member of the 'League of X' elite board.

that was really good Very Happy

=]

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I love Adam Lambert!!

Roswell is love.

Indeed it was DD!
It's good to be reading fanfic again and that was worth it! A good first attempt and writing in 1st person is a hard thing to do but you seem to be doing well!
Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading more installments soon! Very Happy

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im gointto officially start writing again tonight lol it been hectic this past week

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Secret0Window

nwxt installment now up its called: day 2

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Secret0Window

Thanks for feedback

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Secret0Window

**** also, hope you enjoy the rest.

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Secret0Window

Please post all further comments (And, in Dharma_Dork's case, instalments) in this topic in future.

Thanks,

Sawbucks

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#5 Member of the 'League of X' elite board.